The Story of Parrot Pants

Geoffrey the Parrot was flying high in the sky. It was another sunny day and Geoffrey loved to fly on sunny days. It is always sunny where Geoffrey lives. Geoffrey lives on the edge of a hot, dry desert, in a place called Australia, right at the bottom of the world.

One day, Geoffrey was flying and having such a wonderful time that he did not notice a big storm brewing in the west. All of a sudden, there were flashes of lightning and huge booming claps of thunder. A strong wind howled and blew Geoffrey a long, long way from his home. Geoffrey pulled his wing from over his eyes (he was too scared to look during the storm!) and all he could see was water, wherever he looked. He had never seen so much water! The desert where he lived was almost always dry. He wished that he could be back at the desert now, but no matter how hard he tried, he could not find the desert. Suddenly, Geoffrey could see a tiny speck floating on the surface of the water. He flew down from high in the clouds as fast as he could. The speck became larger and larger and larger. It was an island! The island was covered with tropical trees, some with round juicy coconuts and others with long vines dangling lazily in the warm tropical breeze. In the centre of the island there was a big mountain puffing smoke and making terrible roaring sounds (Geoffrey had never seen a volcano before). Geoffrey glided down to a clearing in the trees and fell asleep (he was so tired from trying to find his home).

Night time came and Geoffrey awoke to strange music. He could hear the bang, bang, bang of drums and sounds of people singing. There were unusual smells in the air and Geoffrey realised that he was very hungry. He walked very quietly through the trees (he was still too tired to fly), hid behind a bush and looked at a group of men dancing and singing. Suddenly, a fly started buzzing around Geoffrey’s nose (only people call the nose of birds “beaks”). No matter how hard he tried, Geoffrey could not stop himself from sneezing. He let go the biggest sneeze that any bird had ever sneezed. The music stopped. All the men went still and quiet and looked at Geoffrey. Geoffrey stood very still, hoping that no one would see him. That pesky fly had other ideas and before he knew it Geoffrey let go an even bigger sneeze. Suddenly, the big mountain stopped rumbling and all the smoke coming from its top stopped also. All the men fell to the ground and started to make strange, moaning sounds. From their midst, an old man wearing a strange mask walked forward to greet Geoffrey.

“My lord, you have saved us”, said the strange man. “The great mountain has been silenced by your magical breath. You must return with me back to our palace so that we can reward your mighty deed”. Geoffrey did not know what to say. His hungry tummy said to follow the strange man with the even stranger mask. The mask was all white and at its top it had a row of bright yellow feathers. It looked a bit like those crazy Cockatoos that use to tease him back home when he was a young parrot.

Geoffrey and the men entered a deep cave inside the mountain. The walls glowed red with the colour of flames dancing from fires inside. The group walked to the far end of the cave. In front of them stood a big stone platform. In its centre there was a large stone chair and next to it a big iron box. Giant men with big hammers took turns at striking the box. With a big “clang” and another “bang”, the lid of the box lurched open. Thud! The whole cave shook as the lid of the iron box slammed into the stone platform. The witchdoctor (the man with the funny bird mask) reached into the open box and removed a smaller box encrusted with jewels and gold.

“Come now my lord and receive our tribute for your mighty deed”, said the witch doctor. “Our ancient stories tell us of a stranger that will come one day to save us from the anger of the mountain. The ancients prepared this gift in anticipation of this day. Come now and fulfil your destiny with us!”

Geoffrey was a little stunned at all that was happening. He was still very hungry and he hoped that the gift was a nice big piece of cheese or maybe even a big fat slice of toast coated with yummy peanut butter. Geoffrey took the beautiful jewelled box off the witchdoctor and gently opened its lid. He peeked inside then shut the lid quickly. All of the men, including the witchdoctor, gasped in horror. Geoffrey quickly realised that he must open the box and remove the strange object inside. He put the box down, reached in and pulled out…. a pair of pants! “What is this”, shrieked Geoffrey, temporarily forgetting the men and his hungry tummy. He held the pants in front of him and soon was amazed at all the beautiful colours in the pants. He felt a sudden urge to put on the pants. Before he knew it, the pants were on and then he started to feel very strange and dizzy. He could feel the pants tighten around him until they were a perfect fit. The pains in his tummy went away. He could feel a new strength grow and grow in his wings. His eyes became bigger and brighter and he could see everything inside the cave, even things in the dark. Geoffrey was still trying to understand what was happening when all of a sudden, the men fell to the ground and started making that moaning sound again.

“Par-rot pants …… par-rot pants …… par-rot pants”. The witchdoctor struck the ground with a great rod of gold and all fell silent again. “Henceforth my lord”, proclaimed the witchdoctor, “you shall be known as ParrotPants – as the ancient legends foretold”. With that, all the singing and dancing started again and many foods were brought forth and a great feast commenced. ParrotPants (Geoffrey to his friends) chomped merrily on beautiful pieces of tropical fruit. Meanwhile, every second, he felt stronger and stronger. The witchdoctor leaned towards ParrotPants and whispered into his ear, “ParrotPants, your first test will soon be upon you. You are a mighty warrior, yet still you do not know the power of those pants that you wear. Evil doers will try to steal them from you but you must stop them. There are many who need your help. You must devote yourself to helping them”.

The party continued well into the night and into the day following. Several days later, the sun rose and the island shone brightly in a particularly beautiful dawn. Suddenly, a great darkness emerged from the west. At first it looked liked a cloud, rapidly moving, changing its shape. Then it looked like a giant bird hurtling from a blackened sky. The men screamed in terror as they realised that the darkness was actually a giant dragon. A fierce light shone from its eyes and fire from its nose and then it opened its great mouth and spoke.

“Give me the magical pants now or I will smite this island with my mighty tail and lick you all with my hideously hot breath”, snarled the dragon. Rumour of the power of the magical pants had spread far and wide in the short time since Geoffrey opened the beautiful box.

The men of the island chanted “par-rot pants, par-rot pants”, hoping that ParrotPants would come to their rescue. ParrotPants flew high into the sky and stared straight at the mighty dragon. “Who are you and what do you want”, roared the dragon. “Give me those pants now and I will save your miserable life”. ParrotPants fell briefly under the spell of the dragon when a deep rumbling sound startled him out of his trance.

“ParrotPants, how can I help you?” It was the Mountain speaking and ParrotPants could understand every word. “When you sneezed a few days back, you helped me fix my very upset tummy. I would like to repay you for your help” (Mountains were much more polite than nasty dragons). ParrotPants thought quickly and devised a plan. “Mr Mountain” (you must be polite when addressing such a mighty mountain), “can you please blow dark smoke all over the dragon so that he cannot see a thing!” A great surge of dark smoke spewed from the mountain and covered the dragon. No matter where the dragon went, dark smoke surrounded him. ParrotPants flew quickly down to the trees and gathered lots of the long vines he had seen when he first arrived at the island. He then shot straight up into the sky to find the dragon. ParrotPants could see through the dark smoke, thanks to his new, magical eye sight. He quickly tied the legs and wings of the dragon together (rodeo style) and then grabbed the tail of the dragon and spun him round and round in circles – faster and faster and faster until after one mighty spin, he cast the dragon high up into the sky. The dragon squealed and fell from the clouds at frightening speed, straight into the mouth of the mountain. The mountain made a sound like a gurgle, then a pop, then another gurgle, and then a burp, and the dragon disappeared forever. All the men cheered and the Mountain thanked ParrotPants for providing him with such a delightful meal (he had never eaten dragon before). “Please stay with us ParrotPants and be our friend forever”, wished all on the island.

ParrotPants waved to the men and to the Mountain and thanked them for being his friends. “I must return home now”, said ParrotPants. “I promise to come back one day soon”. “My family will be very worried about me, so I had better go for now”. And with that, ParrotPants flew high into the western sky and flew right back to his home in the desert in Australia and wondered what exciting adventure awaited him next.